


It's 3 AM, Why The Hell Am I Here?

by ThisIsWhenTheWorldEnds



Series: Groupchats [1]
Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alive Carla Yeager, Alive Grisha Yeager, Alive Marco Bott, Alternate Universe - High School, Art Projects, Artist Eren Yeager, Background Relationships, Boredom, Bugs & Insects, Capitals, Character's Name Spelled as Hanji, Chatting & Messaging, Coffee, Coloring Pages, Colors, Dorms, Embarrassment, Eren Yeager-centric, Everyone Is Alive, F/F, F/M, Food, Hot Weather, How Do I Tag, I Did Another One Of These, I Don't Even Know, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Innocent Marco Bott, M/M, Menstruation, Money, Piercings, References to Don't Hug Me I'm Scared, Religion, Sarcastic Eren Yeager, Sasha Being Sasha, Sasha needs money for food, Scents & Smells, Slow Burn, Tattooed Levi (Shingeki no Kyojin), Tattoos, Tea, Teachers are pissed, The Word Game, This Is STUPID, This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things, We All Broke, What Colors Smell Like, What Day Is It?, Why Did I Write This?, Wordcount: 1.000-5.000, Ymir's Fucking High 24/7, groupchat, oil pastels
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-25
Updated: 2019-09-30
Packaged: 2020-05-19 07:37:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 3,025
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19352452
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThisIsWhenTheWorldEnds/pseuds/ThisIsWhenTheWorldEnds
Summary: The gang's in high school! With dorms that can compete with Hogwarts, food that is kind of questionable, and teachers that can stick a chainsaw up their ass, what're they going to get into?





	1. It's 3 AM, Why The Hell Am I Here?

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Our College Adventures](https://archiveofourown.org/works/14963481) by [ThisIsWhenTheWorldEnds](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThisIsWhenTheWorldEnds/pseuds/ThisIsWhenTheWorldEnds). 



> Yes I did another one. Yes it's Attack on Titan again. I thing I only write in this fandom because I'm scared to write in any other fandom. 
> 
> If people don't get were Eren's username came from, I'm going to scream. 
> 
> Anyway, I hope you enjoy. 
> 
> **Usernames:**  
>  ShawtyLikeAMelody - Eren  
> HeManHair - Armin  
> JapaneseNotChinese - Mikasa  
> BillNyeTheRussianSpy - Connie  
> ISmellLikeBeef - Sasha  
> ALotOfFreckles - Marco  
> PrinceCharming/PrinceHorseFace - Jean  
> ShaquilleOatmeal - Krista  
> ISmellColors - Ymir  
> ICanRaiseHell - Levi  
> ProbablyDrunk - Erwin  
> IAmSmart - Hanj

**_ShawtyLikeAMelody_ ** _ added JapaneseNotChinese, HeManHair, BillNyeTheRussianSpy, ISmellLikeBeef, ALotOfFreckles, PrinceCharming, ShaquilleOatmeal, ISmellColors, ICanRaiseHell, ProbablyDrunk, and IAmSmart to  _ _ The Groupchat _ _. _

 

**PrinceCharming:** The fuck is this? 

 

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** A groupchat. 

 

**ISmellColors:** Why?

 

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** Because I wanted to. 

 

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** I literally have no idea which one of you are. I know who 

 

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** _ @HeManHair  _ is, but not the rest of you. 

 

**HeManHair:** Alright, who am I?

 

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** Armin Arlert. 

 

**HeManHair:** Dammit… 

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** That’s dealt with, I’m Eren. 

 

**JapaneseNotChinese:** Mikasa. 

 

**ISmellLikeBeef:** Sasha!!! 

 

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** _ @ISmellLikeBeef  _  Ironic. 

 

**ALotOfFreckles:** It’s Marco! 

 

**ShquilleOatmeal:** I thought the username was funny, but it’s Krista! 

 

**ISmellColors:** Ymir. 

 

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** When the hell did you make that username?? 

 

**ISmellColors:** @ _ BillNyeTheRussianSpy  _ I think when Eren, Jean, you, and I decided to get high.

 

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** Ah. 

 

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** _ @ISmellColors @BillNyeTheRussianSpy  _ Worth it. 

 

**ICanRaiseHell:** Levi.  

 

**ProbablyDrunk:** Erwin Smith. 

 

**IAmSmart:** Hangi Zoë!

 

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** Who’s  _ @PrinceCharming _ ? 

 

**PrinceCharming:** Jean Kirstein. 

 

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** Ah. 

 

_ ShawtyLikeAMelody  _ _ changed  _ _ PrinceCharming _ _ ’s username to PrinceHorseface.  _

 

**PrinceHorseFace:** ...Really? 

 

**HeManHair:** Eren, you made that joke in sixth grade! 

 

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** And? I stand by my point. You all know it’s a fact! 

 

**PrinceHorseFace:** For the last time, I do not have a horse face! 

 

**PrinceHorseFace:** _ @BillNyeTheRussianSpy  _ You agree, right?!

 

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** Well…

 

**PrinceHorseFace:** Well, fuck you too then. 

 

**PrinceHorseFace:** @ _ ALotOfFreckles  _ You’ll tell the truth! 

 

**ALotOfFreckles:** Um…

 

_ ALotOfFreckles _ _ has left the chat.  _

 

**PrinceHorseFace:** ExScUsE Me!?!?

 

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** HAH! 

 

**ISmellColors:** Alright then. 

* * *

 

**_~Private Message between_ ** _ ALotOfFreckles  _ **_and_ ** _ ShawtyLikeAMelody _ **_.~_ **

 

 **ALotOfFreckles:** Is it alright to come back? 

 

**ShawtyLikeMelody:** Yeah, Connie’s talking about some dumbass thing again. 

 

**ALotOfFreckles:** Thanks. 

 

* * *

 

**_~Group Chat~_ **

 

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** Me is a weird word. 

 

**PrinceHorseFace:** How? 

 

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** Well, you know that weird meme thing people do when they type?

 

**PrinceHorseFace:** Yeah? 

 

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** Well, wHeN yOu TyPe LiKe ThIs, it looks unusual, right? 

 

**PrinceHorseFace:** Correct. 

 

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** With me, it looks normal. Me. Even mE looks a little normal. 

 

**PrinceHorseFace:** I see where you’re getting this, but why the fuck are you thinking about 

 

**PrinceHorseFace:** a word at 3 AM? 

 

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** !!! 

 

_ ShawtyLikeAMelody has renamed  _ _ The Groupchat  _ _ to  _ **_It’s 3 AM, Why The Hell Am I Here?_ **

 

**HeManHair:** ...why? 

 

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** I don’t know, it just came to me! 

 

**HeManHair:** ….

 

**JapaneseNotChinese:** My friends are fucking weird. 


	2. Pads Are Great

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this when I was on my period, so...(it also decided to be a dick and start on the 12th.). 
> 
> **Usernames:**   
> ShawtyLikeAMelody - Eren   
> HeManHair - Armin  
> JapaneseNotChinese - Mikasa  
> BillNyeTheRussianSpy - Connie  
> ISmellLikeBeef - Sasha  
> ALotOfFreckles - Marco  
> PrinceCharming/PrinceHorseFace - Jean  
> ShaquilleOatmeal - Krista  
> ISmellColors - Ymir  
> ICanRaiseHell - Levi  
> ProbablyDrunk - Erwin  
> IAmSmart - Hanji

**ISmellLikeBeef:** I’m thankful for pads. 

 

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** What kind of pads are we talking here? 

 

**ISmellColors:** Period pads, dumbass. 

 

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** Oh…

 

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** Awkward. 

 

**PrinceHorseFace:** Why are periods such an awkward topic with guys? 

 

**PrinceHorseFace:** It’s awkward for girls, and they have them! 

 

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** Maybe because it’s gross? And it’s their business? 

 

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** Also, it’s just not girls who have periods. Guys can have them too. 

 

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** How? 

 

**HeManHair:** If a person is Transgender/Non-Binary. 

 

**ISmellLikeBeef:** How the Hell did I stating that I’m thankful for pads start this conversation? 

 

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** It just be like that sometimes. 

 

**ISmellLikeBeef:** Can we talk about periods for a second though? 

 

**ISmellColors:** Go ahead, sister. 

 

**ISmellLikeBeef:** Why did periods have to be a thing? Like, God already cursed us with 

 

**ISmellLikeBeef:** pain during childbirth, were periods actually necessary? 

 

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** I don’t fucking know, God liked being a dick I guess. 

 

**PrinceHorseFace:** Wasn’t that a punishment for Eve since she bit the apple? 

 

**ISmellLikeBeef:** Eve can go fuck herself. 

 

**ShquilleOatmeal:** That’s nice… 

 

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** I feel like we just shat on an entire religion without doing anything. 

 

**HeManHair:** That’s because you all kind of did. 

 

**PrinceHorseFace:** ….

 

**PrinceHorseFace:** Oops. 

 

**ISmellLikeBeef:** And I oop- 

 

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** How much backlash do you think we’re going to get for this bit? 

 

**ISmellColors:** A fuck ton. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Not mine:**
> 
> https://fictionhunt.com/stories/w762x8k/hogwarts-reads-sorcerers-stone/chapters/2


	3. Yellow Is A Very Ugly Color

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bright yellow is a very ugly color. 
> 
>  
> 
>  **Usernames:**   
> ShawtyLikeAMelody - Eren   
> HeManHair - Armin  
> JapaneseNotChinese - Mikasa  
> BillNyeTheRussianSpy - Connie  
> ISmellLikeBeef - Sasha  
> ALotOfFreckles - Marco  
> PrinceCharming/PrinceHorseFace - Jean  
> ShaquilleOatmeal - Krista  
> ISmellColors - Ymir  
> ICanRaiseHell - Levi  
> ProbablyDrunk - Erwin  
> IAmSmart - Hanj

**ShaquilleOatmeal:** You know what’s an ugly color? 

 

**HeManHair:** Red? 

 

**ISmellLikeBeef:** Poop color? 

 

**ALotOfFreckles:** Green? 

 

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** (Green is not a creative color!) 

 

**ISmellColors:** Get that old shit out of here! 

 

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** Don’t Hug Me, I’m Scared will live forever! 

 

**ShaquilleOatmeal:** No, to all the guesses. The ugliest color is yellow. 

 

**HeManHair:** What!? 

 

**ISmellLikeBeef:** So Sunflowers, Dandelions, American Goldfinches, and the Sun are ugly? 

 

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** She can’t  even look at the Sun. 

 

**ISmellLikeBeef:** Shut up! 

 

**ISmellColors:** What about Armin’s hair? Erwin’s? 

 

**ShaquilleOatmeal:** Armin’s in a kind of golden yellow and Erwin’s isn’t full on yellow. 

 

**ShaquilleOatmeal:** Look at this! 

 

**ShaquilleOatmeal:** https://cdn.shopify.com/s/files/1/0487/5605/products/222751_t50_1024x1024.jpg?v=1531403326

 

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** i’M bLiNd!!

 

**ISmellColors:** ….ew. 

 

**ShaquilleOatmeal:** I know, right! Like, who would wear it?!

 

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** JeSuS, wArN A gUy. 

 

**ICanRaiseHell:** The one time I check this group chat, and it’s blinding people. 

 

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** !!!! 

 

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** Hey Levi! 

 

**ICanRaiseHell:** Brat, when are you coming to bed? It’s 3:00 AM. 

 

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** Soon, let me finish this first! 

 

**ICanRaiseHell:** Hurry. 

 

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** (｡･з･)ゞ

 

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** I’m going to bed before I hear sex noises. 

 

**ISmellColors:** Eh, I have an exam at 6:30 anyway. 

 

**ShaquilleOatmeal:** Goodnight! 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://www.reddit.com/r/HPfanfiction/comments/4ynen6/looking_for_a_fic_where_in_poa_everyone_finds_out/


	4. What Do Colors Smell Like?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yep. Yep. I'm doing this again. 
> 
> Anyway, here's this chapter. And I know I already have two work in progress fanfictios (this one and Remember Me), but I have this really cool mental asylum/institution/hospital idea. I want to write it, but...we'll see.

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** _ @ISmellColors  _ What does yellow smell like? 

 

**ISmellColors:** ...what? 

 

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** What do colors smell like? 

 

**PrinceHorseFace:** Oh my god Connie. 

 

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** Get high and smell a color. It works. 

 

**HeManHair:** Don’t encourage him! 

 

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** Hello, answer please! 

 

**ISmellColors:** It’s kind of sour like a lemon, but worse.

 

**PrinceHorseFace:** So, it smells like a lemon, but worse? 

 

**ISmellColors:** ...yes? 

 

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** What does red smell like? 

 

**ISmellColors:** It smells bland. Like how a cherry smells, but blander. 

 

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** Huh. 

 

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** Pink? 

 

**ISmellColors:** Surprisingly, pink smells sweet. 

 

**PrinceHorseFace:** Sweet? 

 

**ISmellColors:** Have you ever smelled SweetTarts? 

 

**PrinceHorseFace:** Yes? 

 

**ISmellColors:** Pink smells like that. 

 

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** Green? 

 

**ISmellColors:** Ink. 

 

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** How the fuck does green smell like ink? 

 

**ISmellColors:** Make a pen explode or get an ink pot and smell the ink. 

 

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** I feel like that’s a bad idea…

 

**ISmellColors:** Eh, it probably is. 

 

**HeManHair:** From what I gather, smelling ink will not harm you. 

 

**ISmellColor:** Well, there’s your answer. 

 

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** Blue? 

 

**ISmellColors:** Blue is just a mix of berries. 

 

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** Black? 

 

**ISmellColors:** Black smells like bitter chocolate. 

 

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** Oh, wow. Well, what does white smell like? 

 

**ISmellColor:** Salted nuts. 

**PrinceHorseFace:** Wait, what does purple smell like? Grapes? 

**ISmellColors:** No, purple smells sweet and sour. 

**ISmellColors:** Like, Sourpatch Kids and SweetTarts put together. 

**PrinceHorseFace:** Oh...ew. 

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** What does Gold smell like? 

**ISmellColors:** Like a sweeter metal. 

**ShawtyLikeAMelody** : Sweeter metal? 

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** What does Silver smell like? 

**ISmellColors:** Metal. 

  
**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** Oh...I don’t know what I expected. 

 

**ISmellColors:** Can I go to bed now? I had a six hour class with dumbass, I’m TiReD.

**PrinceHorseFace:** How the fuck did you get stuck with a six hour class!? 

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** Yeah, go ahead Ymir. 

**ISmellColors:** tHaNk gOd. 

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** Why the fuck did we waste our lives asking what colors tasted like?! 

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** Why the Hell does Ymir know what colors smell like?!

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** And why the FUCK does she have an honest, actual opinion on those smells?!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://fictionhunt.com/stories/b8kmkn3/the-champion-reading-i/chapters/1


	5. Oil Pastels Suck

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for going MIA. I didn't have internet for most of the summer, and when I did it was for a very short period of time. But here's a new chapter!
> 
>  
> 
> **Songs I Listened To:**
> 
>  
> 
> Freakshow - Skillet 
> 
> Heaven Knows - The Pretty Reckless
> 
>  
> 
> **AS OF 9/4/2019, THERE IS AN IMPORTANT NOTICE YOU ALL NEED TO SEE IN THE END NOTES.**

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** I fucking hate Oil Pastels. 

 

**HeManHair:** What happened? 

 

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** We had this art project and you had to sketch a vase and then use Oil Pastels to finish it. 

 

 **ShawtyLikeAMelody:** Well, Oil Pastels are sensitive. People kept dropping them on the floor and ended up stepping on them. 

 

**ISmellColors:** Oh sweet Jesus. 

 

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** The art room looks like Kindergarteners/Preschoolers were in here. 

 

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** The worst part is that we can’t leave until it’s all clean. I'm going to be late for math. 

 

**PrinceHorseFace:** Don’t you have Mr. Humid? 

 

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** Goddammit, yeah. 

 

**ISmellLikeBeef:** Oh, good luck surviving his outburst once you arrive. 

 

**ALotOfFreckles:** Wait, Eren, did the oil pastels get on your clothes? 

 

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** It’s  _ Oil Pastels,  _ and yes. 

**PrinceHorseFace:** I’m not looking up to get it off since my mom freaked out about seeing “How to get blood out of clothes” in my history. 

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** It’s not my fault I had a heavy nosebleed!!! 

**ISmellColors:** It is your fault that you ran into that pole though. 

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** Shut up, Ymir! 

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** Don’t worry  _ John,  _ I already know how to get it out of clothes. 

**PrinceHorseFace:** My name is Jean! It’s French!!! 

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** It’s pronounced John. It’s your mother’s fault for choosing a French name. 

**HeManHair:** Eren, clean up the art room or you’re going to be stuck there forever! 

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** Oh shit, you’re right. Bye. 

_ ShawtyLikeAMelody has left the chat.  _

 

**PrinceHorseFace:** So, what now?

 

**HeManHair:** We go to our classes. 

**ISmellLikeBeef:** Connie and I are going to skip, but you all go ahead. 

**HeManHair:** You both better get to classes are I’m not doing your homework anymore. 

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** FINE. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (￣▽￣)ノ Thanks for reading! Don't forget to comment, kudo, and/or bookmark!
> 
>  **Update Schedule:**
> 
> Thursday, September 5th, 2019. (9/5/2019) 
> 
> Monday, September 9th, 2019. (9/9/2019)
> 
> Saturday, September 14th, 2019. (9/14/2019)
> 
> Friday, September 20th, 2019. (9/20/2019)
> 
> Wednesday, September 25th, 2019. (9/25/2019)
> 
> Monday, September 30th, 2019. (9/30/2019)
> 
>  
> 
> _As you can tell, this month is filled up with updates. All updates have the goal of ending at 500 or more words. Please note that I do also have school, and that takes a great deal of time. Please also note that I do not have a comfortable working space._
> 
>  
> 
> _The internet doesn't reach in my bedroom, but it reaches the living room. I'm literally sitting in a unused kitchen chair by my little sister's Disney Princess table because the living room chairs are disgusting. As you may or may not know, sometimes you have to be comfortable to be able to think of anything (for me, that's usually the case.)._


	6. We're All Broke Though

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First update of the monthly schedule! And it's at 344 words! 
> 
> **Usernames:**  
>  ShawtyLikeAMelody - Eren  
> HeManHair - Armin  
> JapaneseNotChinese - Mikasa  
> BillNyeTheRussianSpy - Connie  
> ISmellLikeBeef - Sasha  
> ALotOfFreckles - Marco  
> PrinceCharming/PrinceHorseFace - Jean  
> ShaquilleOatmeal - Krista  
> ISmellColors - Ymir

**ISmellLikeBeef:** You know what I really, really want right now? 

 

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** To sleep for 72 hours? 

 

**HeManHair:** To read every book about the world? 

 

**ISmellColors:** Weed? 

 

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** $5,0000 worth of food

 

**ISMellLikeBeef:** YESSSSSSS! 

 

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** Bitch, we can’t even afford $500 worth of food. 

 

**PrinceHorseFace:** There’s no way in Hell you would ever get $5,0000 worth of food. 

 

**ShaquilleOatmeal:** Not in our lifetime. 

 

**ALotOfFreckles:** And definitely not with the jobs we have….

 

**ISmellLikeBeef:** Hardies pays me enough! 

 

**HeManHair:** Sasha, you get $8.39 an hour. 

 

**ISmellLikeBeef:** I’ll save up! 

 

**PrinceHorseFace:** You’d be saving your money for years. Without spending a single penny. 

 

**ISmellLikeBeef:** >:(

**HeManHair:** You’d never eat it all before it went bad anyway. 

 

**ISmellLikeBeef:** >:(

* * *

 

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** Our teachers talk like they don’t know we’re going to have poor ass jobs. 

 

**PrinceHorseFace:** Mrs.Stewart said that I could be a scientist. 

 

**ISmellColors:** Yeah, that ain’t happening. 

 

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** “Once broke, always broke.” - Anonymous

 

 **HeManHair** : That's technically not true, but go off I guess

 

**ALotOfFreckles:** We joke about being broke now, but what happens when we have to pay our own bills?

 

**ISmellColors:** Oh shit….

 

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** Whelp, I’m not going to make it past nineteen. 

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** Time to plan our funerals :). 

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** Nah, just throw me in a box with my laptop and bury me. 

**PrinceHorseFace:** Jaeger, you’d be dead. You can’t use your laptop. 

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** Ghost laptop >:). 

**ISmellColors:** ….bitch. 

**HeManHair:** To be honest, we might end up with successful jobs. High schoolers usually think the worst anyway. 

**PrinceHorseFace:** Uh-huh. Because any kid that went to our school has a successful job. 

**JapaneseNotChinese:** Elizabeth Rome turned into a hooker/prostitute.

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** ..Well, damn Mikasa

**ISmellColors:** That’s what that bitch-y prom queen, slut gets

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** Jeez, Ymir. 

 

**ISmellColors:** :). 

**HeManHair:** Alright. That’s not how I imagined this conversation to go. 

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** Armin, think about the group of people you call your friends. 

**HeManHair:** ...That makes sense. 

**PrinceHorseFace:** You think? 

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** Uh..guys...it’s 2:30 PM. 

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** ...shit. 

**HeManHair:** WE’RE 30 MINUTES LATE TO CLASS!

**PrinceHorseFace:** QUICK, THINK OF AN EXCUSE AND GO TO CLASS!!!! 

**ISmellLikeBeef:** AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (￣▽￣)ノ Thanks for reading! Don't forget to comment, kudo, and/or bookmark!


	7. Coloring Books and Other Things

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Today was a boring Monday. School started on 8/14/2019, but it feels like a whole year already. 
> 
> **Usernames:**  
>  ShawtyLikeAMelody - Eren  
> HeManHair - Armin  
> JapaneseNotChinese - Mikasa  
> BillNyeTheRussianSpy - Connie  
> ISmellLikeBeef - Sasha  
> ALotOfFreckles - Marco  
> PrinceCharming/PrinceHorseFace - Jean  
> ShaquilleOatmeal - Krista  
> ISmellColors - Ymir

**PrinceHorseFace:** Guys, my mother just discovered the cringiest thing about our childhoods. 

 

**ISmellColors:** Pictures from your hippie phase?

 

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** Good God, all the fucking tye dye you wore. 

 

**PrinceHorseFace:** NO! She found old coloring pages and art projects. 

 

**ISmellColors:** Really? That’s what we’re talking about? 

 

**PrinceHorseFace:** Yes, because remember this? 

 

**PrinceHorseFace:** _ [images of creepy kid coloring books.] _

 

**ISmellLikeBeef:** Oof, I remember those. They’re terrifying. 

 

**PrinceHorseFace:** Not only that, I found some of Jaeger’s pages. 

 

**PrinceHorseFace:** _ [images of coloring pages with titans on them.] _

 

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** Jesus, Eren. 

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** What? They’re Titans. 

__

**ISmellColors:** What in the Goddamn is a Titan?

__

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** Giant naked humanoids with no genitalia. 

__

**HeManHair:** They’re these things he made up as a kid. 

__

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** Armin, kids make up normal looking people. 

__

**ALotOfFreckles:** Is it EATING A PERSON!? 

__

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** Oh, yeah. That’s their “food”. 

__

**PrinceHorseFace:** “Food”?

__

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** Titans don’t need to eat. 

__

**PrinceHorseFace:** ...stepping away from that, also found some of you crappy art projects. 

__

**HeManHair:** Oh God. 

__

**PrinceHorseFace:** _ [images of crappy art project from grade 4 through 7.] _

__

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** MY EYES!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! 

 

**ISmellColors:** Ew. Just Ew. 

**ShaquilleOatmeal:** Eren’s the only one that looks great. 

**ALotOfFreckles:** Even his 4th grade drawings look good….

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** i hated when they forced my to color them. They always looked terrible after. 

**ISmellColors:** They’re still better than our’s. 

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** Hm. 

**PrinceHorseFace:** You all want to come over and look at all this crap? 

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** Hell yeah! 

**ISmellColors:** I’ve got nothing better to do. 

**HeManHair:** Sure. 

**PrinceHorseFace:** M’kay. Let me tell my mom. 

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** She’s going to go on a cleaning spree. 

**PrinceHorseFace:** Oh well. 

 

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** Jesus, Eren. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (￣▽￣)ノ Thanks for reading! Don't forget to comment, kudo, and/or bookmark!


	8. I'm Bored!!!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sasha is bored and wants food.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a very boring chapter, I apologize. 
> 
> **Usernames:**  
>  ShawtyLikeAMelody: Eren   
> HeManHair - Armin  
> JapaneseNotChinese - Mikasa  
> BillNyeTheRussianSpy - Connie  
> ISmellLikeBeef - Sasha  
> ALotOfFreckles - Marco  
> PrinceCharming/PrinceHorseFace - Jean  
> ShaquilleOatmeal - Krista  
> ISmellColors - Ymir

**ISmellLikeBeef:** I’m bored!!!! 

 

**BillNyeTheRussianSpy:** So am I. 

 

**ISmellColors:** The dorms are boring, aren’t they? 

 

**HeManHair:** Maybe you could study while you can? 

 

**PrinceHorseFace:** Ew, Armin. It’s a Saturday. 

 

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** You’re probably the only high schooler that studies on a Saturday. 

 

**HeManHair:** At least I’m not failing my classes! 

 

**ShaquilleOatmeal** : We could meet up at my dorm and play some games?

 

**ISmellColors:** Yeah, it’s better than doing nothing. 

* * *

 

**BILLNYETHERUSSIANSPY:** Does anyone remember that game that has only squares?

 

**BILLNYETHERUSSIANSPY:** And there were two modes? Survival and Creative? 

**ISMELLCOLORS:** Minecraft?? 

**BILLNYETHERUSSIANSPY:** Yeah!!! 

**PRINCEHORSEFACE:** What the hell happened to our usernames? 

**SHAWTYLIKEAMELODY:** It’s a new thing the site has added. They thought it looked better. 

**PRINCEHORSEFACE:** RIP dyslexic kids. 

**ISMELLCOLORS:** Anyway, what the hell can we do now? 

**ALOTOFFRECKLES:** We could go to the pet store and offer to help out?

**PRINCEHORSEFACE:** Krista and you would be tempted to adopt all the animals.  

**SHAQUILLEOATMEAL:** Yeah, probably. 

**ISMELLCOLORS:** This has been a very boring day. 

**BILLNYETHERUSSIANSPY:** Aren’t Saturadays supposed to be fun? Like we go party and stuff? 

**PRINCEHORSEFACE:** That’s just in movies. No one would invite us to a party anyway. 

**SHAWTYLIKEAMELODY:** While you all were bored, I worked on my projects. I also studied for my math test! 

 

**HEMANHAIR:** Only because I made you! 

**SHAWTYLIKEAMELODY:** I still did it though!

**HEMANHAIR:** I guess that counts??  

**ISMELLLIKEBEEF:** I want food. Anyone want food? 

**SHAWTYLIKEAMELODY:** Do we have any money for food? I have $30.89 as of right now. 

**PRINCEHORSEFACE:** $20.12

**HEMANHAIR:** $18.73

**BILLNYETHERUSSIANSPY:** $10.00

**ISMELLCOLORS :** $40.29

**SHAQUILLEOATMEAL:** $30.34

**ALOTOFFRECKLES:** $17.67

**JAPANESENOTCHINESE:** $38.90

**ISMELLLIKEBEEF:** That should be enough money for food.

**HEMANHAIR:** As long as we don’t go overboard, we should be fine. 

**SHAWTYLIKEAMELODY:** So, where do we go? 

**ISMELLCOLORS:** … 

_ ISMELLCOLORS has left the groupchat.  _

**HEMANHAIR:** I’m not staying for this fight. 

_ HEMANHAIR has left the groupchat.  _

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What do you all think about the capital usernames? (This is your time to complain.)
> 
> (￣▽￣)ノ Thanks for reading! Don't forget to comment, kudo, and/or bookmark!


	9. A Lot Of Things Go On

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This took exactly 30 minutes and 28 seconds for me to wright. How do I know? I timed myself using one of Markiplier's Uno videos. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a06CuKPFFIk&list=PL3tRBEVW0hiCPgZianTgwWfn5sXsX5wAt
> 
>  **Usernames:**  
>  ShawtyLikeAMelody - Eren  
> HeManHair - Armin  
> JapaneseNotChinese - Mikasa  
> BillNyeTheRussianSpy - Connie  
> ISmellLikeBeef - Sasha  
> ALotOfFreckles - Marco  
> PrinceCharming/PrinceHorseFace - Jean  
> ShaquilleOatmeal - Krista  
> ISmellColors - Ymir

**PRINCEHORSEFACE:** I just witnessed something terrifying. 

 

**BILLNYETHERUSSIANSPY:** What? A naked teacher? 

 

**PRINCEHORSEFACE:** A teacher, but she wasn’t naked. 

 

**SHAWTYLIKEAMELODY:** What the hell happened? 

 

**PRINCEHORSEFACE:** I was going to the teacher’s office to talk to a teacher, 

 

**PRINCEHORSEFACE:** and when I opened the door, I wasn’t ready for what I saw… 

 

**ISMELLCOLORS:** What happened already? 

 

**PRINCEHORSEFACE:** When I opened the door, I had this teacher looking me dead straight in the eye.

 

**PRINCEHORSEFACE:** If looks could kill, I would be dead. 

 

**ISMELLLIKEBEEF:** That was probably Mrs. Gill, her 4th period was wild. 

 

**ISMELLLIKEBEEF:** The was school shit everywhere and people were screaming at the top of their lungs. 

 

**PRINCEHORSEFACE:** Every teacher’s nightmare. 

* * *

 

**ISMELLCOLORS:** I just witnessed the greatest thing in fucking human history. 

**SHAQUILLEOATMEAL:** Ymir, don’t you dare! 

**BILLNYETHERUSSIANSPY:** What happened!? 

**ISMELLCOLORS:** Someone knocked on the door and I was about to open it when Krista just shouted

**SHAQUILLEOATMEAL:** DON’T

**ISMELLCOLORS:** “DON’T OPEN THAT DOOR!” and I stopped and just heard a quiet little knock on the door. 

**ISMELLCOLORS:** Turns out Krista’s been avoiding a student because she saw him when she accidently went into the boy’s bathroom. 

**ISMELLCOLORS:** I’m stilling laughing my ass off. 

**PRINCEHORSEFACE:** I did that once. I avoided a girl all year. 

**BILLNYETHERUSSIANSPY:** How?!

**PRINCEHORSEFACE:** I don’t know, I guess the embarrassment kept her away. 

* * *

 

**SHAWTYLIKEAMELODY:** What the fuck’s with Sasha?! 

**HEMANHAIR:** What’s going on? 

**SHAWTYLIKEAMELODY:** She’s eating everything. Including other people’s food. 

**SHAQUILLEOATMEAL:** What could have caused that? 

**ISMELLCOLORS:** Nothing changed in her routine as far as I know. 

**BILLNYETHERUSSIANSPY:** Oh, I gave her coffee. 

**HEMANHAIR:** You did WHAT.!?

**BILLNYETHERUSSIANSPY:** She looked like she was dying, I had to do something!

**SHAWTYLIKEAMELODY:** Well, now noone has food. What a great lunch. 

**BILLNYETHERUSSIANSPY:** I didn’t know what I unleashed!

* * *

 

**ISMELLLIKEBEEF:** Do you all remember September 20th, last year? 

**SHAWTYLIKEAMELODY:** What a night that was. I remember….

**PRINCEHORSEFACE:** ha, HA. 

**ALOTOFFRECKLES:** What happened? 

**HEMANHAIR:** Jean fell into the lake. When he came back up he was covered in bugs so he screamed. 

**SHAWTYLIKEAMELODY:** I still laugh at the way he ran. 

**PRINCEHORSEFACE:** V E R Y  F U N N Y.

**ISMELLCOLORS:** You’re right, it is. :). 

**HEMANHAIR:** I think I still have a video. 

**HEMANHAIR** **:** [video of Jean running around covered in bugs while Eren laughs his ass off.]

**PRINCEHORSEFACE:** Fuck you guys. Fuck all of you. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fanfiction you should read: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12817748/1/A-Heritage-of-Ice-and-Snow
> 
> (￣▽￣)ノ Thanks for reading! Don't forget to comment, kudo, and/or bookmark!


	10. Ugh...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the day late update! I dropped my laptop while it was plugged in, and it kind of broke it (?). Don't worry, I can still charge my laptop, but for a couple days I was nervous that I broke it.
> 
> **September 30th's update will be THE LAST update of 'It's 3AM, Why The Hell AM I Here?'!!!**

**BILLNYETHERUSSIANSPY:** Ugh...what day is it? 

 

**ISMELLCOLORS:** Are you so stupid that you don’t even know what day it is? 

 

**BILLNYETHERUSSIANSPY:** HeY, I hAvEn’T sLePt SiNcE 11:30 AM, yesterday! 

 

**SHAWTYLIKEAMELODY:** I haven’t slept in two weeks :). 

 

**HEMANHAIR:** EREN!! 

 

**SHAWTYLIKEAMELODY:** Well, I did have like two minute naps here and there, but who’s counting? 

 

**JAPANESENOTCHINESE:** One day you’re bodies going to shut down. 

 

**SHAWTYLIKEAMELODY:** NOT BEFORE I FINISH MY WORK IT’S NOT. 

 

**ISMELLLIKEBEEF:** What are you going to do? Come back as a ghost and beat your body back up? 

 

**SHAWTYLIKEAMELODY:** YES. 

 

**BILLNYETHERUSSIANSPY:** Can I just know what the day is please?! 

 

**ISMELLCOLORS:** Wait, aren’t you on your phone? 

 

**PRINCEHORSEFACE:** Connie, what the hell? 

 

**BILLNYETHERUSSIANSPY:** The time is set wrong!!!

 

**ISMELLCOLORS:** Why??

 

**BILLNYETHERUSSIANSPY:** I don’t know!!! 

* * *

**SHAWTYLIKEAMELODY:** Let’s play a game. 

 

**PRINCEHORSEFACE:** Sure, I’m bored. 

 

**SHAWTYLIKEAMELODY:** When I type a word, you type the first word that comes to mind. 

 

**ISMELLCOLORS:** Hm, alright. 

 

**ShawtyLikeAMelody:** Food. 

 

**ISMELLLIKEBEEF:** Food!? 

 

**ISMELLCOLORS:** Green beans. 

 

**BILLNYETHERUSSIANSPY:** Gravy!

 

**PRINCEHORSEFACE:** Mashed potatoes.

 

**HEMANHAIR:** Carrots. 

 

**SHAQUILLEOATMEAL:** Turkey! 

 

**ALOTOFFRECKLES:** Chicken noodle soup. 

 

**SHAWTYLIKEAMELODY:** School. 

 

**PRINCEHORSEFACE:** Hate. 

 

**BILLNYETHERUSSIANSPY:** Bad grades. 

 

**ALOTOFFRECKLES:** Boring.

 

**ISMELLCOLORS:** Help me. 

 

**ISMELLLIKEBEEF:** Oof. 

 

**SHAWTYLIKEAMELODY:** Pencil. 

 

**BILLNYETHERUSSIANSPY:** Useful.

 

**ALOTOFFRECKLES:** Lead.

 

**ISMELLCOLORS:** Wood.

 

**ISMELLLIKEBEEF:** Hard.

 

**SHAQUILLEOATMEAL:** Yellow.

 

**SHAWTYLIKEAMELODY:** Book. 

 

**ISMELLCOLORS:** Reading. 

 

**SHAQUILLEOATMEAL:** Informational.

 

**ISMELLLIKEBEEF:** Paper

 

**PRINCEHORSEFACE:** Print. 

 

**ALOTOFFRECKLES:** Author. 

 

**SHAWTYLIKEAMELODY:** Internet. 

 

**PRINCEHORSEFACE:** Entertaining. 

 

**BILLNYETHERUSIANSPY:** Savior. 

 

**ISMELLCOLORS:** Websites.

 

**ALOTOFFRECKLES:** Animals! 

 

**HEMANHAIR:** Information.

 

**SHAWTYLIKEAMELODY:** Charger. 

 

**HEMANHAIR:** Useful.

 

**BILLNYETHERUSSIANSPY:** Breakable. 

 

**ISMELLCOLORS:** Money.

 

**SHAQUILLEOATMEAL:** Important! 

 

**PRINCEHORSEFACE:** Can we stop now? Break is almost over. 

 

**SHAWTYLIKEAMELODY:** Yeah, fine.   
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (^_^) Comment, kudo, and/or bookmark please!!


	11. Hot

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last update! Then I plan to not create any more works for a while. 
> 
> **IMPORTANT NOTE AT END!!**
> 
> Sasha reminds me of that "vine" (is that what it is? I don't know.) that's like "I don't have enough money for chicken nuggets! :'(".

**BILLNYETHERUSSIANSPY:** It’s too fucking hot. 

 

**ISMELLCOLORS:** I was driving earlier and I had to peel my back off the seat. It hurt too. 

 

**SHAWTYLIKEAMELODY:** My dry paint is  _ melting.  _

 

**ISMELLLIKEBEEF:** Y’all just wanna go to Jean’s? 

 

**PRINCEHORSEFACE:** Why my house??

 

**HEMANHAIR:** You have the best A.C. 

 

**PRINCEHORSEFACE:** Ugggggh, fiiiine. 

 

**ISMELLLIKEBEEF:** Ugh, now I want food. 

 

**SHAWTYLIKEAMELODY:** _ I’m not paying for it. :) _

 

**BILLNYETHERUSSIANSPY:** Good luck trying to get anyone to pay for it. 

 

**ISMELLLIKEBEEF:** No worries, I’ll just ask my dad. 

 

**\------------**

 

**ISMELLLIKEBEEF:** He said yes, but I have a budget of $30. :(

 

**SHAWTYLIKEAMELODY:** I would give you a budget too, with how much you eat. 

 

**PRINCEHORSEFACE:** How the fuck or you so skinny?! 

 

**ISMELLCOLORS:** Must be all the running she does to get that food. 

 

**PRINCEHORSEFACE:** That must be it. 

  
**ISMELLLIKEBEEF:** >:(

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **IMPORTANT NOTE:**   
> I now have an instagram for this account! **thisstorydoesntend**!

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for giving this fanfiction I try! Any tips for writing in a different fandom? Please?


End file.
